The Age To Come

There seems to be at least some interest in the prophetic, what ‘it’ is all about and how I was given this gift.  So this page is my attempt to explain to those who asked, and any others who are interested, how this all came to be.  I hope it clarifies for you something that by its nature is quite difficult to put across.

The prophetic, in many ways, is a John the Baptist type ministry, in that the Lord becomes the greater and you the less.  Really, I do not think it could be any other way.  However, I can only really speak and explain from experience, so this of necessity is going to have to involve something of me.  I’ll try not to make a habit of it though

The gift
How can I explain it? It is like trying to explain what the colour blue looks like. And I can only speak for myself, others’ experience may differ.   I think it clearer to use imagery rather that to attempt a ‘rational’ explanation.

Sometimes it is as if the glass we all see through dimly is less dim, and I experience in some way the glory of the Lord, just a fraction, a slither. And I could take no more; for that glory is awesome…I have no words. The burning heart of holiness, a love that would strip you to your bones, and then sear them to powder, is but a fraction of that Reality. Holiness, love, judgment, mercy and justice, they are not distinguished. How I understand the OT prophets now – switching between the heart of burning judgment and the heart of burning love. They are one and the same thing.

Sometimes, just to be infected for a moment with that heart, how can a man not prophesy? It would be easier to stop breathing! Then the coldness and indifference of men hit me, and it is deeply painful…there is certainly a cost.

Sometimes I have described it as if the Lord gives me an outline of what is on His heart, and I have words that are like jigsaw pieces that, when put into place, approximate the outline that He showed me in my spirit.

Sometimes it is like a volcano, welling up from within.  I am aware of the indescribable immensity of that Power, the Spirit of God Himself.  Were but a fraction of that Power to escape, it would pulverise you, tear your flimsy foundation apart, blasting you with the impossible majesty and beauty of the Lord.  Truly, we are earthen creatures, and in our current state entirely unable to fully behold our awesome God.  Is not our Bible full of these encounters?  Yet, our hearts are often so dulled, that we cannot comprehend; then in our futile arrogance we imagine that we can possess God.  Easier to possess the heart of the sun than the Heart of the Son!

All I can give you is a pale, weak, diluted fraction of the immensity that is Gods’ Heart.  It is all I can hold.  All I can do. 

When I see the evil that comes from us, when I see the wickedness of hearts grown calloused and cold, what can I do but prophesy?  It is good that God hides His glory.  For what man could stand it?  A heart that prophesies is a heart that has seen God, even if through a glass dimly. 

I say again, how could I do other than speak?  When the light shines, all is thrown into sharp relief and the things we wish to hide, we wish to ignore, to push under the carpet, are visible in all their naked ugliness.  What man cannot prophesy the things of the Lord then?  It overwhelms you.  Overwhelms you with love, with the burning heart of justice, with anger at the depravity you see around you.  This is why Jesus overturned the money tables when He saw the sacred profaned.  What fellowship has light with darkness?

But then, just as You Lord are ready to burn with unquenchable fire the malice and wickedness of men, then comes Love.  And such Love!  Have you ever experienced such Love?  It would destroy you, unshielded, as you are. 

The heart of Love is beyond all explanation, all bounds.  All I can say is that it is the heart of Love that prevents us being destroyed in an instant.  But it must be an agony, an agony for the Lord.  At least, the tiny fraction of what I comprehend is agony for me, when I behold the beauty and majesty of the Spotless Lamb, then behold the depravity and coldness of men, then see how Love endures this evil, and yet still Loves.  How Lord?  How do You bear this?  I can only say the Lord….cannot destroy….it is anathema to Him.  He would not choose any to perish.  What, then, would you choose?  When it comes to it, at the end of all things, what would you choose?  For this choice, has ever been before us.

The giving of the gift
Being called by God to the prophetic is a very large claim for anybody to make.  It is a claim I do not make lightly, or before much time, prayer and discernment.  It is rather strange to one trained to think as a scientist, to find this whole new vista opening up.  But God calls whom He will call, or rather appoints whom He will appoint.

So how did this come about?  In June 2000, we were in Canada seeking to discern Gods call for us to move here from England (which is another story).  One of the things we did not understand was ‘why Canada?’ – why did we need to move here?  In response to that question, one person told us that “a prophet is not without honour except in his own country”.  This was one of those times where words pierce you, as if God is speaking straight through the words of another.  The strange thing is, that while the impression and the power remained, the specific word regarding ‘prophet’ was hidden and did not consciously register at that time.  Though in retrospect I believe it was the beginning of the calling.

During the spring of 2002 I first felt God saying that I was to be a prophet.  This call became as persistent and nagging as the original call to Canada, and after a while I began to take it seriously.  During the next 9 months I pondered this call, wondering what it meant and what to do with it.

My first prophetic vision was given during the winter of 2002/3 as a direct result of asking God a question (be careful what you ask!), where I saw Gods view on the state of our church.  After much trepidation, I shared this vision with our local Church leadership.  I found it confirmed in two ways, firstly through the local prophetic body, and secondly by a lay leader, who used the visions in a sermon, and then proclaimed that the one who gave the vision was a prophet.  This was remarkable for us, in that I had never made such a claim to anyone.  It was for us the external confirmation of a strengthening internal call.

Subsequent to that, there have been many other visions, more or less understood – these are all written down elsewhere.

St Paul said you should eagerly desire spiritual gifts.  While I have desired to serve God better, I have to say that desiring the gift of prophecy was never on the horizon.  None of this was my idea.  What I am is by the Grace of God alone – so may the Glory be His alone!

I do not have an easy way of explaining what this appointment feels like.  There is both an imperative and a command, a burning fire, an authority.  Jeremiah in Ch 20 v9 says ‘but if I say “I will not mention Him or speak any more in His name,” His word in my heart is like a fire, a fire shut up in my bones’.  And as such, at some point I have to proclaim.  That’s not naturally in my nature, but the Lord is relentless.

I have some idea that this appointment will be a hard path indeed, of pain and joy intermingled.  I may yet regret saying ‘yes’, but I know I’d regret it far more if I’d ever said ‘no’. The message I believe I am called to prophesy is uncompromising and also needs to be lived out personally in our own lives.  The Lord is moving upon this land and His word will not return to Him empty!

Conclusion
I hope this helps you to understand what this is, at least for me. I believe that the Lord is calling such gifts into being again as the world grows dark. I know how the world treats the prophetic. But the words must be spoken nonetheless. If not me, then others. Perhaps some may listen. I can do no other than speak what I am given, God help me.

To finish this mini-essay is something of a poetic attempt to express the prophetic gift.  I am not naturally a poet – and when you read what I wrote you may be tempted to agree – but it is one last attempt to express the inexpressible.

White wild fire
A prophetic autobiography
8th January 2005

The white wild fire burns within.

This is natural to me: the calm, the desire to smooth, to pacify, not to provoke.
To bring peace and to be in love and fellowship with all.

Yet, the white wild fire burns.
One moment, a candle shrouded,
Next the heart of heaven itself burning within, wild, free, untameable.

It burns in both justice and love.
Holiness inexpressible.
A measure to the world.
Provoking, judging, sometimes blunt, never without the burning core of love.

It cannot be held – white wild fire.
It does not easily fit through the heresy filter.
Overwhelming and overcoming.
When I burn with the white wild fire.